Category Archives: One-liners

Half the time, I’m thinking, “What the fuck are you doing?” The other half, “And just what the fuck are you looking for, anyway?” What are my motives? Is this my opportunity? Do I have the means? And the jury’s still out on all accounts.

The last few days have been pretty fantastic in more ways than one. I just wanted to make a record of it for the next time I forget what it feels like.

When I die, more than anything else, I hope that I am remembered as having been genuine and sincere.

In the digital age, it’s surprisingly easy to just delete someone. It’s the opposite that’s so goddamn difficult.

While browsing through one of those weekly alternative rags, I happened to see an ad for a particularly gruesome looking stripper/escort named Pandora, and suddenly, if only for one fleeting moment, the world made perfect sense…

If it weren’t for all the obsessive people out there, nothing would ever get done. At least not right.

Not only do I dig my own holes, but I also kick the dirt in over my head and plant the tombstone.

The phrase “working on it” applies to just about every aspect of my life right now. Which isn’t necessarily a bad thing, just difficult at times.

You know what I hate about food? First you have to heat it up, and then you have to let it cool off. You’d think by now they’d have thought of a better system than that. Just call me T. Furrows.

I seem to have stumbled upon a significant other. And I like it. A lot.